This article explores the contrasting attitudes toward bed sharing in Asia and the West, highlighting how cultural norms influence sleeping arrangements and parental choices, with many Asian families viewing the practice as integral to relationships and family dynamics.
Bed Sharing in Asia: A Cultural Norm Challenging Western Views
Bed Sharing in Asia: A Cultural Norm Challenging Western Views
While bed sharing is often contentious in the West, many Asian families embrace the practice, viewing it as a natural part of parenting and familial bonding.
In the United States and various Western nations, parents frequently express concern over the notion of sharing a bed with their young children. Conversely, in many Asian cultures, the practice of bed sharing is seen as a common and acceptable part of parenting. The focus often revolves not around whether to share a bed, but rather at what age to transition children into their own sleeping spaces.
The way children sleep holds significant implications for safety, emotional development, and the overall well-being of the family unit. This practice can shape parental intimacy and impact mental health, showcasing the deep connections fostered through shared sleep.
In South Korea, for instance, parents often choose to bed share to cherish fleeting moments with their children, mindful that they will eventually grow independent. Inae Kim, a 40-year-old office manager, emphasizes the joy of closeness while she and her husband navigate sleep arrangements with their two daughters, aged 5 and 7. Aiding in their decision, bed sharing has become common as their girls transitioned from cribs.
In contrast, Western viewpoints, particularly those in the U.S., emphasize separate sleeping arrangements. Guidelines from the American Academy of Pediatrics strongly discourage bed sharing for infants under six months due to safety concerns. This shift toward independent sleeping can be traced back to historical influences from Victorian-era perspectives on parenting and sleep, as discussed in recent literature.
Notably, research highlights a stark difference in bed-sharing rates between regions; over 60% of parents in countries like China, Japan, and South Korea report bed sharing, with rates soaring above 70% in India and Southeast Asia. Meanwhile, Western countries exhibit much lower prevalence, ranging from 5% to 15%.
Interestingly, the stigma associated with bed sharing in the U.S. may lead to underreporting; an assertion made by Professor Helen Ball, who advocates for a more nuanced understanding of its prevalence.
Across Asia, motivations for bed sharing vary, influenced by cultural norms and practical constraints. High-rise living spaces in urban areas like Seoul lead parents to consider the potential noise disruption from crying during sleep training sessions. Similarly, in Hong Kong, limited living space makes bed sharing a practical solution for families.
Some parents who themselves experienced bed sharing during childhood find it difficult to adopt alternatives. Erin Lim, an entrepreneur from Seoul, describes bed sharing as a natural extension of her upbringing, where multiple generations cohabitated. Following her own experiences, she transitioned both her sons into their own rooms at ages 4 and 2 but still keeps an additional small bed in hers for family closeness.
In India, cultural attachment to bed sharing holds strong even among urban professionals familiar with Western sleep training methods. This familial closeness remains prevalent, highlighting the desire for bed sharing as part of parenting rituals, even during travels abroad.
In Singapore, where bed sharing seems less prevalent and sleep training increasingly popular, some parents feel social pressures that challenge their choices. Nonetheless, individuals like Ho Kin Ing embrace bed sharing, ultimately cherishing the bond it nurtures, despite initial societal scrutiny.
Social perceptions can lead to guilt or stress regarding sleep arrangements in some communities, revealing an intriguing dynamic in parental roles and expectations. In East Asia, where non-bed sharing can often feel like a deviation from nurturing behavior, parents may grapple with societal pressures as they navigate their preferences.
While parental experiences regarding bed sharing lead to diverse outcomes, the modern Asian family still sees value in co-sleeping, often viewing the practice as foundational to their familial bonds. As these cultural contexts continue to evolve, the global conversation about bed sharing will likely develop alongside them, bridging understanding between differing parenting styles.
